Amendment: Nothing much was going on, but Carol was getting more and more publicity.
I was getting to stuck with looking for info regarding Carol Todd prior to October 2012. In brief – she lived apart from Amanda from 2009 until March 2012; she was a special-needs teacher at Kilmer Elementary, though I’m not 100% certain of her real role, and, I assume, at CABE later on; she seemed to be very much into the use of technology.
Now, let’s investigate events after October 2012.
Carol Todd’s part in all this is very odd. If she was a teacher, an intelligent woman, how come it looks like she completely failed to see her own daughter’s self-destructive path? She had many opportunities to intervene, but why did she even seem to sanction Amanda’s final video, knowing that all the problems in Amanda’s life had stemmed from her online exposure? It doesn’t make sense. Unless she was faking it. Unless she DID know the whole story, and felt that this was all about two things: trying to make her daughter look good before finally faking her death.
With all the conflicting evidence, it’s not possible to draw decent conclusions. I can pose some questions though.
Who is the great manipulater in all this – Amanda or mother? or both? The September 2012 was a masterpiece in manipulation. The background music, the sombre colours, the poignant, perfectly delivered flashcards, all leading to the climactic scenes of cutting and the tattoo. The actions must have been well-rehearsed – the timing was near-perfect. The spelling was a bit off, but we’ll allow that – it gives it a certain realistic quality. Is this possible for a girl on her own – one who we know suffered from learning difficulties? Maybe. There are many similar videos to use as a template. But isn’t it a bit too good? Did mother or anyone else help?
In interviews following October 10th, Carol Todd gives THREE different accounts of her knowledge of the video: she didn’t know about it until some time after the event; she sort of knew about it at the time, but only was fully aware as soon as it was finished; she actually was there as it was being made, and supplied the paper and pens. (Trust me on this. I will provide evidence from articles later.) This (surely?) is indicative of something amiss. I will come to this later, as I want to pose some more questions.
After the event, something that was striking was the real lack of grief shown by Mrs Todd. Watch closely – it is really difficult to see any signs. In a couple of TV interviews, we are told she cried off-camera, but that’s as far as it goes. And she was very rapidly all over the media, with barely any time to even slightly grieve in private. The first thing she really seems to get upset over is the fact that she wasn’t invited to a conference on bullying. The next thing she concerns herself with is being in the media spotlight about as often as she can. And things seemed to move remarkably fast with her at the helm – the ‘Snowflake Walk’ and the memorial service were all suggested and organised pretty quickly – almost as if it had all been pre-planned. When you add in the convenient timing to coincide with the Canada-wide bullying campaign, things look suspicious.
To counter what I have just said, it is possible that Mrs Todd went on a sort of adrenaline filled crusade. Instead of being poleaxed with grief, she threw all her thoughts and energy into anything that would block out the grief – and it is still continuing now. This is surprising. Even allowing for some sort of grief-driven fervour, by now it would have led to collapse. But it hasn’t. It doesn’t quite work. I will no doubt recap all this later.
In other teen suicide cases, mothers have responded differently. Some recount the actual incident and how horrible it was (Carol Todd never speaks of anything remotely connected to the actual incident – like who found Amanda, where she was, what it was like when the ambulance/police arrived); other families have just retreated into private grief. Others have started foundations and so on – but NONE have courted publicity to the extent that Carol Todd has. I find this astonishing. Again, I might come back to this.
And one major, major flaw. Mrs Todd may not want to talk about horrible things like how her daughter died. But there is never so much as a hint about the FUNERAL. Everything else is fully publicised, but not one word about the funeral is spoken or written. Nothing like ‘Today was the hardest day’, ‘I said goodbye to my daughter’ – no oblique references, no euphemisms, no mention of church, the cremation, what happened to the ashes, who conducted the ceremony, nothing. Again, I find this highly suspicious. I don’t expect them to parade around with a video of the funeral, or to say the name of the church, or to give exclusive pictures of the casket – but you would expect one small reference to slip.
Another thing to watch is how Carol Todd’s story changes over time. It’s too fantastic to believe, and virtually all of her responses are reactive. At the beginning, it’s still all ‘my little angel this, my little angel that’, but as soon as the cracks appear – as soon as people begin to realise Amanda was no angel – it begins to change. She starts to make mistakes. She can’t make up her mind whether her daughter was lonely and isolated or surrounded by friends; whether she was withdrawn and reclusive or effervescent with joy; whether she was hated and bullied or loved and admired; naughty or nice. She can’t decide if Amanda kept things to herself, or if they talked about everything. Then later, more bizarrely, she seems to imply in an article that she was aware of ABSOLUTELY everything. The story is so far off the credibility scale, it’s impossible to think. The classic example of ‘confession from confusion’ – or, shall we say, of giving people enough rope (but that might be poor taste) – is Carol Todd’s blog. I will be looking at that, and all her interviews, in detail next. It’s just a question of where do I start.
Once more, thanks for reading all this. It might be getting a bit jumbled again, so I apologise for that. It might be a bit short on evidence, i.e. links to articles, but I will endeavour to improve on that. But please – leave comments. It’s the only way I can improve upon this and open up debate!