Well – Day 25 begins. It seems like Day 325! But – another day, another douleur, as they say!
I’m still not sure what people want from this blog. Sometimes I wonder what I, myself, really want from it. To inform people? Definitely. To prevent kids from getting into trouble online? Maybe that’s delusional. I’m driven to try and provide facts and to arrive at some version of ‘The Truth’. But that sounds like I’ve got some sort of complex. Are people just interested in the Amanda Todd legend? Or are people more interested in the problems surrounding it? I don’t really know. However, I feel I need to get something clear at this point – to clear up things regarding my view of pedophilia and pedophiles in all this.
I can tell you with as much absolute certainty as I can – pedophiles are nowhere near this case. If people want me to, I can tell you how some of them work and what some of them get up to. But what stops me from going in to too much detail is that it can be quite frightening. It is easy to whip up a storm of hatred and paranoia, but I don’t want to give every parent sleepless nights. I have seen some useful information on a parenting website regarding what not to do online (as always, I didn’t bookmark it. I will have to see if I can find it for you) but I have also found, as usual, horrendous ‘spot the pedophile’ type of information that basically says that any man over the age of thirty who lives on his own is a potential criminal!
I can give you one pointer, though. In many cases, if you think someone’s a pedophile, he’s not.
(An unfortunate aside. As a male, I feel ashamed of my gender. In the vast majority of cases such as pedophilia, it is always men involved. Therefore I always describe stalkers, predators and what have you as males. But maybe I should say that women are sometimes involved – they can be facilitators. But for what I have to say here, it’s easier just to say ‘he’ all the time.)
So back to where I left off. Pedophiles are not easily identifiable. They are cunning. Many of them act almost in broad daylight, either covering their activities in disguise or relying on the blindness of people close to them. They are manipulative. People in the U.K. are stunned by the Sir Jimmy Savile case and the alleged Sir Cyril Smith activities. Note here: both of them received knighthoods! Now, of course, everyone says it was obvious, but that’s what people always do after they find out. You don’t get knighted for being an obvious pedophile!
I’ve lost my thread a bit. Bear with me.
If the Amanda Todd story is used as an example of pedophile activity, that is wrong, and it will distract attention from the real problems of the story. People will be looking in the wrong direction when it comes to dealing with the solutions.
People have accused me of being a pedophile supporter because I have sought to defend Kody Maxson – the thought process being ‘He’s a pedophile, you’re supporting him, that makes you one.’ Laughable, really.
Another aside. Way back when, when I started all this investigation, I got viciously attacked online. Threats of violence, death threats, reported to the police – you name it, I got it. The fact that some guy in Australia was going to come round to my house 12,000 miles away was a real worry! I was actually accused of being Kody Maxson, the stalker, and more!
But I made a mistake. After being harassed, I lost my temper and said words to the effect of ‘OK I’m Kody Maxson or whatever, I confess, now go away!’ That made it worse! Seriously, these people thought that they had located the central character of all the story!
Some person came online: ‘We know you are a child abuser because you confessed’. Despite all my efforts to explain, it was to no avail. The more I reasoned with them, the more they replied that I was covering myself. And then I thought ‘If I make my story so utterly ridiculous that no-one in their right mind would believe it, maybe that will work. The conversation went something like this:
Person: We know you are a child abuser. Just how many children have you abused?
My response (tired and bored): 9783
Person: We knew it. And what names did you use to disguise yourself?
Me (OK, at this point I was stupid, but it’s too late now): ‘Father Christmas’, ‘Scout Leader’, ‘The Pope’
OK. Perhaps I AM my own worst enemy.
But yet again, I’ve digressed. Where was I?
OK – I’m not a pedophile supporter. As always, it is easier to get hysterical and vilify people, and, to a certain extent, some of these people deserve it. But we should never lose track of who or what we are in society. Surely, by now, we should abandon the lynch-mob mentality? There are evil people in society, and we should think about how we deal with it. But we should also try to understand. Some of these people are mentally ill. Many are victims of child abuse themselves. It’s complicated – too complicated to go into here.
Blimey – I’ve wittered on a bit today. I hope it’s not been nonsense. But I’ll try to finish.
Basically, put all the thoughts about pedophiles to one side in this story. But don’t ignore the danger – they are out there. It doesn’t mean never allowing your child to go on the Internet, and it doesn’t mean locking up all men who look suspicious.
It’s all about knowledge and understanding. In the same way you warn kids not to accept sweets from strangers, warn them not to accept friend requests from people they don’t know. There’s no need to scare them to death. Although I’ve called Facebook and the Internet a cesspit, there are lots of good things out there – it’s just about learning to steer clear of the dangers. Perhaps I could put it a better way:
The ocean can seem frightening to some, but once you step your toes into it, it can be great. But if you don’t learn to swim, or you get out of your depth, it can kill you.
Did ANY of this post make sense?